Bring Back Darvocet -N propoxyphene and generics

They took away our pain management pill... Darvocet.
I can only imagine the infamous "group" of people that wanted it off the market, have not needed pain management for cancers, bone problems, severe back pains, even severe arthritis... or were able to be treated with other medications. For many of us, other medications do not work.
I started a new petition,
For those suffering in pain... that propoxyphene based pain killers were their only means of pain management (without stomach upsets, without herkey jerkey jitters, without jacked up dreams, without being comatose). For those that can't find a viable, not to mention cost, effective alternative.... For those that lay in bed in pain...

Please Sign this petition so we will be heard!!!
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UPDATE: NEW WEBSITE DEDICATED ONLY TO BRINGING BACK DARVOCET/DARVON
bringbackdarvocet.com
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http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions/bringbackdarvocet/

Friends of MUSIC....

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Music Keeps us moving, lets you remember you’re alive. It’s the friend that is ALWAYS there for you no matter the circumstance, the friend who can help you acquire the inspiration you need at the precise moment you need it. It’s a part of me, and it’s become an important part of my girl is too.

I encourage people when they find something they truly enjoy. Anything that can inspire creativity and help promote a sense of worth… I’m all for it! My daughter has been sketching out dresses since she was little. So when our favorite “new” band started a dress designing contest… oh she was all over that! If you are so inclined, please visit http://www.halestormrocks.com/ to sign up for an account (it only take about 45 seconds & I’ve never gotten any junk mail from this) then go to http://www.halestormrocks.com/photo/classy-crasher/

...And vote for Sarah’s dress “Classy Crasher” (for “Prom crashing”) by clicking the last star all the way to the right of the 5 stars. She’s been watching the numbers and ecstatic that there are people out there actually seeing her design. If you leave a comment for her, she’d be so very tickled & overjoyed! This has been a great self esteem booster!

For those of you rockers out there, you WILL love this band, and be glad you signed up.

Halestorm is a newish band, fronted by Lzzy Hale a female vocalist with a strong enthralling voice. They are a playful, good-natured yet mischievous bunch, that produce music for those that want to be put on a loud fast train to… somewhere and softer sides that hug you when you need a friend to understand.

I’d be grateful if you’d help me encourage self esteem, and you’ll find a fantastic musical crew to boot!

Taste of the STORM....

Halestorm that is!!

This song goes well with the TWILIGHT movie clips.....

Rockin that on that fast train…..

Gotta have more cowbell

“It’s Not You”!

Clouded

I’m not too sure where my head is at these days. I think I’m stuck in the clouds somewhere. I’ve been on a sort of a “living spree”, just crossing the line of irresponsibility. Not in a self destructive way, just living life doing little things. Fun things. Shelving daily responsibilities and trading them in for the spur-of-the-moment. I’ve been in control and responsible for too much too long, I’m tired. I’m enjoying being spontaneous (with restrictions of course, yet somewhat impulsive). Even little things add up. They also subtract, from the pocket book. A few realties are starting to hit and bring me out of the clouds ever so slightly. Damn. That actually didn’t last very long. I still haven’t found that new balance.

I’m in the midst of usual rounds with doctor visits, and added new ones. I’ve found that Gerd / Acid Reflux is something to not be ignored. I’ve let mine go for so long. My regular doctor never mentioned any serious consequences of AR. In fact, My doctors always told me I just have a “nervous stomach”, a little Acid Reflux. Well a little DOES go a long way… It has gotten so bad, that it has severely corroded my esophagus, vocal chords (so that’s why I can’t hit the high notes like I used to), ear canals (an excuse for the hearing loss and frequent slight ear aches), and my sinus (which have felt stuffy non stop for over a year)… My LES (the opening to the stomach from so with the severity of AR/Gerd) doesn’t close much of the time, allowing everything to ‘come back up’. While lying down, it can come up and just sit in the esophagus. NASTY. So I will be having surgery at U of C to have part of my stomach wrapped around that LES opening to help it close. Hopefully my esophagus will then have a chance to heal…. AR / Gerd is a pretty common problem, and most don’t get this severe. Sometimes there aren’t any symptoms. At least, not that you think is out of the ordinary for you...

While this is going on, I’ve had the “same old” sharp pains I had when I suspected something serious was about to happen, before cancer was confirmed. They’ve been getting more frequent. On my last visit to the oncologist, he found a new “mass” and suggested I have it check out immediately. This is where the chain on my leg starts weighing me down, begins tugging and pulling me out of the clouds where I was enjoying merriment. I begin to wonder, if this is happening all over again… What will I do? I reason in my mind, I need the put the esophagus/stomach at the highest priority. Surly more chemo will make that problem worse as it did the first time. I have an appointment Thursday at U of C and will check that mass out. Am I getting ahead of myself? Maybe. Maybe not. I’m not normally the type to freak out at every diagnosis or every little lump, bump, or minor surgeries… When I do get excited, I’m usually right. Best to start preparing.

As I write this, I realize, I’m not coming out of the clouds slightly. I think I’m on the express crash. I’m not digging reality tugging at me. It starts to remind me, that like it or not, I do still have responsibilities. Bills to pay, some kind of insurance to find, appointments to keep, trying to keep the house and everyone in it running more smoothly… It reminds me I’ve not done all the things I thought I wanted to accomplish. New things are continuously cropping up, and I start those, instead of finishing other projects I started… My writing has become sloppy. But I’m spending time with my daughter. Making memories. That’s more important to me then any other responsibility or project.

another passing... moments of selfishness...

… When someone passes away, especially from cancer, my eyes glaze over as I turn inward and start questioning my own mortality. I feel horrible for the family, the wife, their kids… I start to worry about my own family…. I feel like a horrible person and riddled with guilt. I start to shed tears which quickly turn to uncontrollable sobbing.

With all the doctors appointments and surgery scheduling going on, cobra coming to an end, trying to find insurance for my family, all the things that need to be done and organized, not even attempting normal daily tasks… It’s the blade of straw that breaks the camel’s back….. ((a phone call comes in))

When someone passes away, most people say things like “what a shame”, “a huge loss”, “how terrible”, “he will be missed”, “at least he’s in a better place” or sometimes are just speechless…

Initially I feel those things as well, but my thoughts quickly take on a tone motivated by selfishness. There is a true sadness because you actually feel a kinship. It’s that damn club that no one wants to be in, rearing its ugly head, which grows larger in numbers by the day. But then the soul searching quickly ensues and questions of can I DO this? What have I wasted my time doing? What’s going to happen next? When? What’s making us all sick? I need to move, or my whole family will get sick. I begin a silent prayer for the families of the recently departed, but then I break down and launch a campaign for my own health and my own family’s well being in imploring prayer. I feel guilty and selfish, yet, I can’t stop myself.

With a friend beginning chemo, a friend just having finished, and one that is actually in the hospital right now, in and out of consciousness, losing the fight... I wish I could be Superman or Mighty Mouse and save them all, when the fact of the matter is I never know for sure if I can even save myself. When will I lose? I feel like a dreadful person for worrying about myself, in the midst of someone else’s pain.

Shock, devastation, empathy, compassion, sorrow, sometimes relief (the suffering is over), dismay, reality, dread, fear, loss of hope, feeling alone, what about my family? Maybe I should start packing now. But I’ll be too far away from my doctors. I hate to take my daughter away from her best friend… I’m getting a headache... Anxiety, shame, guilt, remorse, prayerful pleading….

These things all rush in during that split second and you feel you’ve hit a brick wall while you’re sitting there with your mouth hanging open in disbelief.

I truly thought I was ready and had come to terms with this kind of thing. I thought I was equipped with faith. I thought I was a strong, together person… but then I find out how truly unprepared I actually am… I still am taken by surprise.

… I just found out our long time family friend passed last night. His dedicated wife has been taking care of him, while also battling cancer herself. While his pain has halted, his family’s continues. I can’t stop thinking about her. Her pain, her struggle, her fear, and the kids… …Our friend, passed away after 10 pm on May 16^th, 2010. The note forwarded to me from his wife, was touching and at the same time, truly heart wrenching.

I want to find a hole in a rainforest somewhere to crawl into…

I…. I’m out of words.

Sometimes I AM selfish, but I know I’m not the only warrior who admits to being this way.

Ronnie James Dio

Ronnie James Dio, passed away early in the morning on May 16^th, 2010. He was a true icon of my musical growth. One that was there near the beginning. One that helped push me toward heavy rock / metal… One that I share the cancer demon with… So he’s not just a part of my growth, but a piece of my transience as well.

http://www.ronniejamesdio.com/




We are sunlight
We can sparkle and shine
And our dreams are what we're made of
So just hold on
You can make it happen for you
Reach for the stars and you will fly

Hook ‘em to the heavens ♫ \m/ \m/ ♫