A CURE for CANCER?!!!!!

Oh my God. I just saw something that gave me chills down my spine and I went weak in the knees. I had tears of joy quietly squeezing out. This is the most promising thing I've ever seen!! I have a sense, this one just might work!!!! And go figure, the idea was sparked by a 16 year old!....

You can see the video here: http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/OnCall/husband-searches-cancer-cure-wifes-death/story?id=9212102&page=1

or you can read the below from ABC:

Did a Devoted Husband Find a Cancer Breakthrough?
After His Wife Died From Breast Cancer, Husband Turned to Cancer Research
By CLAIRE SHIPMAN
Dec. 1, 2009
Throughout his years of groundbreaking research, endocrinologist Dr. David Vesely never gave curing cancer a lot of thought.
But then it became personal.

"We started to work on cancer when my wife died of breast cancer seven years ago," Vesely said.

His wife, Clo, died in 2002, leaving Vesely and their five children behind. Vesely said he directed his sorrow into his work at the James A. Haley Hospital in Tampa, Fla., and seven years later he may have a breakthrough.

An Idea From the Heart

Vesely said it was originally his son's idea to conduct research. Brian, who was 16 when his mother died, was looking for a way to channel his grief a month after his mother's death.
In the late 1980s, Vesely, focusing on heart disease, discovered three hormones made by the heart that prevented normal heart cells from getting bigger and multiplying. He wondered if they could also control cancer cell growth.

Vesely and Brian set up an experiment and left cancer cells and heart hormones alone in a Petri dish. The cancer cells were blown apart by the body's own hormones.

"Well, the cells blew apart. So we thought, 'maybe we did something wrong,'" Vesely said. "Because you never know ... but the second time, we knew it was real."

Vesely began studying the effect on mice that had been injected with human cancer cells, by pumping the hormones under their skin.

"Usually after a month, they eliminate up to 80 percent of human pancreatic cancers growing in the mice," Vesely said.

Since then Vesely said he has eliminated other deadly forms of human cancers in mice, including 67 percent of breast cancers and 86 percent of small cell lung cancers, all with almost no side effects.

Although Vesely, 66, said he wouldn't go as far as to call it a cure for cancer, he is hopeful.

"But if it does cure one cancer in human, it will cure almost all of them, or eliminate them," Vesely said.
Human Clinical Trials to Begin

Kalos Therapeutics is raising money for the first human clinical trials for Vesely's findings. But as Vesely waits, he said he is feeling the urgency from hundreds of e-mails from people dying of cancer asking when his treatment will be ready.

"It's mostly funding. They need money to move ahead," Vesely said.

"If we can make some dent in cancer ... it will be spectacular," Vesely added.
Vesely's Finding Met With Hope and Caution

Vesely published his work, and although the medical world is intrigued, it is also cautious.

"I think that there's potentially promise here, but I think the real question is whether these very potent hormones will be tolerable at the doses required," said Dr. Mark Ratain from the University of Chicago.

Vesely said he is also cautious about raising expectations "because you don't want to get too far ahead of yourself."

I HAVE A NAME! I HAVE A FACE!!

I worry every day if I will continue to survive this disease. This morning, I’m beside myself with fear and worry. My head is spinning and I’m in tears. What about my daughter? What about YOUR DAUGHTER? YOUR NIECE? YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER?

The new “guidelines” for Breast Cancer Screening has been changed by our government. Welcome to the new National Health Care system. (we’ll wait till you’re good and festered with cancer so treatment just won’t be effective therefore withheld…. or with luck, you'll be dead before then and we won't have to worry about spending money on you over burdensome creatures.)

I saw this coming. Many of us saw this coming.

So many did not. Well here ya go. The first MAJOR DAGGER to our health…….

((they based this new guideline on bogus, outdated information))

I HAVE A NAME! I HAVE A FACE!!

Please Please PLEASE READ THIS in it's entirety. Our children are at stake!!

(((I will also be working toward stopping this action and hope you will stand with me!)))

November 16, 2009

"The recommendation to change screening is a huge step backwards," says Dr. Marisa Weiss.

To the Breastcancer.org community:

The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force recently recommended dramatic changes to current breast cancer screening guidelines. Breastcancer.org is strongly opposed to these recommendations.

The proposed new guidelines recommend starting regular screening mammograms at age 50, rather than at age 40 as current guidelines recommend. They recommend screening before age 50 only for women with a much-higher-than-average risk of breast cancer. The proposed new guidelines also call for mammograms to be done every other year instead of every year, as recommended by current guidelines.

The proposed new guidelines are based on research that looks at the effect of breast cancer screening on society from a public health perspective. This means the researchers were looking at how changing breast cancer screening guidelines would affect the overall public, rather than individual women. In proposing the changes, the task force members said that starting mammograms later in life and doing mammograms less often would save a large amount of money. It also means that about 3% more women would die from breast cancer each year. The task force members felt that the amount of money saved (from fewer mammograms and side effects of extra biopsies and treatment) was greater than the value of more lives saved (3% fewer women surviving breast cancer).

At Breastcancer.org, we are deeply troubled by both the analysis that led to these proposed guideline changes and the effect these proposed changes would have on the health and lives of women. Our specific concerns:

• The analysis was based on older mammography techniques, meaning the researchers mostly looked at results from film mammograms instead of digital mammograms.
• The analysis was based on some inaccurate assumptions about optimal treatment after breast cancer is diagnosed. For example, it assumed that women diagnosed with hormone-receptor-positive, early-stage breast cancer would receive and benefit from hormonal therapy but not chemotherapy, even though we know that many of these women do receive and benefit from chemotherapy after surgery. Inaccurate assumptions like this may have caused the researchers to underestimate the number of lives that would be lost should the proposed changes in screening be adopted.
• The analysis did not adequately consider the combined benefit of early detection (with current screening guidelines) and new treatments that have resulted in steadily improving survival rates in recent years. Screening cannot be looked at in isolation as a snapshot. Screening happens as we continue to improve both diagnosis and treatment. But we can’t treat what isn’t diagnosed.
• The proposed guideline changes would mean that many breast cancers would be diagnosed at a later stage, making it harder to become cancer-free. Later-stage diagnoses result in more women with metastatic disease (that has spread to other parts of the body) and more women with large or multiple cancers requiring mastectomy (too late for breast-conserving treatments).
• The proposed guideline changes would mean that younger women would be diagnosed later. Breast cancer in younger women tends to be more aggressive, so early diagnosis and treatment is more critical for them. It is the lives and futures of younger women that would be lost if the proposed changes are adopted.

Expressed as nameless, faceless numbers, the 3% decrease in breast cancer survival might seem like an acceptable trade-off when compared to the economic benefits of changing breast cancer screening policies. But breast cancer affects a very large number of women, so 3% of that number is not insignificant. The reality is that more women -- mothers, daughters, sisters, grandmothers, and aunts -- will die each year from breast cancer, which is neither reasonable nor acceptable.

We at Breastcancer.org encourage medical professionals and everyone affected in any way by breast cancer to raise their voices against these surprising and dramatic proposed changes in the guidelines for breast cancer screening. Our belief is that lives should be saved, not lost, and our commitment to you is that we will continue to strongly advocate for policies that support this fundamental mission.

Marisa C. Weiss, M.D.
President and Founder, Breastcancer.org
Director of Breast Radiation Oncology, Director of Breast Health Outreach
Lankenau Hospital

Maxine Jochelson, M.D.
Director of Radiology
Evelyn H. Lauder Breast Center
Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center
Professional Advisory Board, Breastcancer.org

Emily F. Conant, M.D.
Professor of Radiology, Chief of Breast Imaging
Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania
Professional Advisory Board, Breastcancer.org

http://www.breastcancer.org/opinion/mammography_guidelines.jsp

I will be working toward organizing some kind of something to fight this!

Please stand stand with me!

Please if you know ANYONE affected by Breast Cancer, have them join and sign AGAINST new Mammography Guidlines.... http://community.breastcancer.org/

http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/110/topic/744011?page=8#post_1601243

I HAVE A FACE - I HAVE A NAME !!!! continued...

Write your representatives senators & congressmen/woman....
Tell them you are opposed to this new shut up and die "guideline" which is merely a prelude of what's to come in our health care. TELL THEM YOU ARE WATCHING & PAYING ATTENTION. If we don't voice, they think we don't care. Please, don't let this opportunity slip through your fingers.


Representatives: http://www.house.gov/house/MemberWWW_by_State.shtml
Senators: http://www.senate.gov/general/contact_information/senators_cfm.cfm

You can copy and paste the below, be sure to READ IT BEFORE SENDING, it requires your changes.

I am opposed to the New Guidelines set forth by Preventive Services Task Force on changing the age of Breast Cancer Screening Recommendations to 50.

I have breast cancer.... (supply your story)
OR
I know someone who at 40 was diagnosed by mammography, when a doctor ignored her findings of lumps in her armpit, that was then diagnosed with advanced/metastatic/carcinoma of the breast. She would be dead by now if she waited till 50 for a mammogram.

The age for mammography should be at minimum one at age 30.


Thanks everybody!

Halloween Flashlight Hazard !!!!

Do NOT use or give to children!!!!
Black & Orange flashlight with 6 stencils
(also sold in 3 pack of black, orange and green flashlights) FIRE HAZARD

This morning (10/21/09) I heard on WLUP 97.9 radio with Johny B a mother’s chilling story of a flash light that should have been fun turned extremely dangerous.

She played with the flash light for about 5 minutes with her 3 year old before bed. And another 5 minutes later, the mother smelled a very odd smell. Upon investigating, she found the flash light, in the OFF position, melted at the opposite end of the light (so it wasn’t heat from the bulb), it was the area of where the spring connects to the battery I believe she said, had burned through the pillow case into the pillow (it must have then fallen off the pillow) on to the bed and proceeded to burn through the sheet, mattress pad, leaving burns on the mattress itself. Her daughter was sleeping next to it. Had the mother not noticed the smell, it could have ended a very tragic outcome! She called and visited Target where the flash light had come from (in Crestwood, IL) When she went there, they told her “wow too bad” and “what do you expect to get out of this?” Not only did they never return her calls, they wouldn’t give her the information off the package so she could contact the manufacturer. She was not after personal gain. She wanted a RECALL so this doesn’t happen to anyone else’s child, or allow a worse incident. She did file with Consumer Products and they are “in the process of testing” the product. There is currently no recall. No information being given out.

This did not ignite at the bulb, but at the back of the flashlight at spring. This is seriously dangerous!

Again, they are Black & Orange flash lights with 6 stencils, purchased at Target in the ‘bargain bin’ (also sold as black, orange, and green flashlights in a 3 pack).


I will be back soon with updates for blog, I really wanted to get this out there to everyone that would purchases something like this at Halloween time for the kids.

HAVE A HAPPY AND SAFE HALLOWEEN!

Poisoned. Our slow slaughter…

Dark clouds loom around us all…

I do believe bad thing sometimes happen for a reason, a lesson to be learned not necessarily for the person directly inflicted, but perhaps for others related, or a remote person or people gaining wisdom from someone else’s misfortunate story. On the other hand bad things can happen to someone because of someone else’s actions. That’s a part of free-will given to us which we all possess. Often too many people choose to use their free-will unwisely.

With my cancer infliction, I never once asked “why me”. Many people do. I never did. I learned long ago that isn’t the correct question. But in the past years, I have wondered “HOW” did something happen. HOW, is my question so I might learn from it.

I’ve began a new journey on HOW. I intended to write about High-Fructose Corn Syrup and it’s serious consequences forced upon us, until I found an alarming story. One which paralyzes me with fear. One which makes me wonder, “how can the government knowingly allow this reckless practice to continue?” One which I hope will prompt everyone to discontinue dry cleaning services and put these places out of business. Any clothes I own that have been deemed “dry clean only” is an absolute crock of crap. I’ve done them all at home with my own hands and they’ve come out even better. I will publish this information in the next day or so. Much of Illinois is known to be effected. You too will be bewildered, and question “how can this be allowed to continue?” I hope we will all be prompted to act on this information and somehow in a clear voice stop this deliberate, unnecessary contamination which can and does exterminate life, eating away at us like a quiet and slow slaughter.

TROUBLED WATERS, Contamination... Hello? Erin Brockovich?

This is something that may affect everyone reading this. Please bear with me. Even if you are not in Illinois, and especially if you ARE. Our very lives actually may depend on it.
All through this twisted journey of life altering, and ongoing cancer battle I’ve been on, I’ve never asked “why me”, however, now and again I entertained the thoughts of HOW me? HOW may have this cancer been caused? There is a reason for everything, and sometimes bad things are caused because of someone else’s free will which can affect others in a very negative way.

I reminisce of long time residents and immediate neighbors. Louie and Grace raised 5 kids in their house next to me. He died of cancer about 12 years ago. Shortly after, a neighbor directly across from him passed away from some type of cancer. Some time after that her son Lloyd, who we affectionately referred to as “the deaf guy” cos Sarah had a hard time understanding at the age of 2 why he always grunted and made strange sounds at her, also passed away from cancer. Louie’s wife Grace died just over 5 years ago from cancer. In each of these cases, I imagine it was found too late to do anything about it. But there’s 4. Right next to me and right across from me all in the time we’ve lived here. What about farther down the street? Or The next block over? What is going on over there? A few years back, directly across from me, my neighbor Ellen, found cancer and had surgery to remove it. So far so good for her. Thank God. Then me… I did get to thinking “what the hell?” Is it something in our food? Is it something in our water? I began to seriously worry about the health of my husband and future health of my daughter. We found out that just across the highway my neighbor’s brother had cancer, his wife, and currently having treatments, their daughter.

Two weeks ago, Ellen’s husband Wayne approached us with more devastating news. By accident, because of x-rays from his knee surgery, they found colon cancer within him! Now hold on just a minute. This is WAY TOO MUCH. Louie and Grace had been the longest residents. Then Lloyd and his mother across from him. Currently, we are the longest residents in our area now at 17 years, followed by Wayne and Ellie at about 12 years. What is going on? What is attacking our little corner of the world? I re-visited my thoughts of poisonous carcinogens in our water. Possibly run off from the highway? A cleaning fluid from the railroad tracks just across the street? Poisons from boats on the chain of lakes that may be seeping into our wells? What gives? HOW did all of us get some form of cancer? Who’s next? My husband? God forbid my daughter? I’ve become consumed by what may be going wrong. I’ve even thought of hitting the streets by my house to find if there are more I haven’t heard about.

Now, I haven’t purchased a Chicago Tribune in years, nor do I normally buy donuts. Recently, on a whim I decided to buy a few donuts to share with the extended family. When I was leaving, I glanced at the Trib sitting there on the counter. I almost walked out, but something caught my attention and I decided to go back and purchase it. I never took the time to read it, but oddly, lugged it along with me on vacation. I finally look at the headline stories… which were alarming. Not just to me, but alarming to ALL of us. I urge you ALL to read this article. It has really got my panties in a bunch. So much so that I’m afraid to go home. It shows there are over 500 sites in Illinois alone, of KNOWN contaminated water supplies. This contamination can cause… cancer. Only a few of these are on a list for “clean up”. It is getting into the Fox River and into aquifers where our own wells siphon our water supply into our homes. It is even in water you may think is clean just because you pay the city for it. Many have been KNOWN since 1990!!! The top 9 are listed in this article. There is a link where you can look up to see if you may be one of the effected areas. If you have a DRY CLEANERS near you, odds are, you’ve got trouble. It is the chemical perchloroethylene, (also called PCE, Perc, the brand name is TETRACHLOROETHYLENE. – “common synonyms” are PERCHLOROETHYLENE; ETHYLENE TETRACHLORIDE; CARBON BICHLORIDE; CARBON DICHLORIDE) from these dry cleaners which could be silently killing us. I was devastated to see, on this list the first one in line is FOX LAKE. Now I’m petrified my cancer will return if I continue to bathe or drink my water. I’m terrified my daughter who has been party to this her entire life may already have something lurking with in her. It has also been known by the ever popular “them”, that it travels through the ground (I assume through aquifers?) and can turn up as a vapor leaking from your property into your house like radon does, which will also cause cancer or other life threatening illness, as well as being in your soil when you dig it up or play on it.

#1 – Dry Cleaners are killing us
#2 – Illinois set aside $2.7 million dollars for clean up of some sites. (apparently it’s not a costly task, and if that’s true, then why hasn’t it been done sooner?! Maybe because of fact #3. Why, if these places were KNOWN contaminants are they allowed to stay in bleeping business and continue to poison our lakes, rivers, aquifers, countless animals. People. Me. My child?)
#3- the dirty rat Rod Blago, TOOK $2 million of that to “balance the budget”. Wait, to pay for CTA trains to have TVs installed, spending more then $2 million, but forget cleaning up messes we allowed that is making unsuspecting people sick? Where is the logic in that?!?! I guess there’s no money for clean up now.
#4 – they use the term “common fix”. I’m thinking it ain’t fixing shit people. Houston, we have a problem.

I urge you to check to see if your area is on this list. http://drycleaners.apps.chicagotribune.com/
Whether it is or not, aquifers can run far and deep, I implore you to get your water and perhaps your soil tested! Not just for Perc, but other carcinogens that may be lurking as well, such as Dichloroethylene and vinyl chloride which is also in the lovely water supply up here. Just because you are not on this list, does not mean you are safe. It may mean no one has found out yet!

Take action. I am. And if I find it in my well, bet your ass there will be hell to pay.
Erin Brockovich, brace yourself. We’ll be dialing your number!

Full Trib Story, here (2 articles)
http://www.chicagotribune.com/health/chi-dry-cleaners-pollution-bd26-jul26,0,5184515.story
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-dry-cleaners-vapor-bd26-jul26,0,4767111.story

Our Daughter's & Son's...

Wouldn’t it be great if our daughters (and some sons too!) weren’t just sitting ducks?

There is a buzz about a breast cancer VACCINE…. Wouldn’t that be AMAZING? I heard it through the grape vine and am anxious to find more information. One important factor for this is research research research.

A very dear friend is taking a hike. In one short month, August, she is walking for 3 days to raise money for breast cancer with Susan G Koman For the Cure. Cure. What an awesome word that could be! Not only does she have women around her that have had or are currently suffering from this disease, her mother sadly had a reoccurrence 12 years out from the first diagnosis. Colleen would give the shirt off her back to help anyone, and is almost half way to her goal, I’d like to see if we can get her PAST her goal! There is so much more research needed to be done, especially in the area for those that are at a higher stage. The quiet ones that don’t want to express their fear to lower level stage women. They need hope too. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could give severe stage IV more then just a little more time? It brings tears of joy to my eyes to hear her say... "If you know or have someone who is diagnosed with Breast Cancer, (or any type of cancer) please give me their name so I can carry them with me through all 60 miles. " I know we are in very tough economic times, but if you can even just a little, please support Colleen in her crusade... click here to help Colleen help our future and our children's future! You can donate or even join her team!

THANKS EVERYBODY!!

Below is a note from Colleen:

Dear Family & Friends,

I have taken on an incredible challenge! On August 7th, 8th & 9th, I'll be walking 60 miles over the course of three days. Each day of the event, my teammates and thousands of others, will walk 20 miles and spend two nights camping under the stars with thousands of other women and men on this same journey.It's for an event called the Breast Cancer 3-Day, which benefits Susan G. Komen for the Cure and the National Philanthropic Trust Breast Cancer Fund. Every advancement in breast cancer research, treatment, education and prevention in the last 25 years has been touched by a Komen for the Cure grant. They are working hard to build a future without breast cancer.I am required to raise a minimum of $2,300 to participate in the event. By the time that you finish reading this, two more women will be diagnosed with breast cancer, and another one just died from it. In fact, while I am walking those 60 miles, 110 women will die from this horrible disease. 110 families will lose a mother, or a daughter, or a best friend.An amazing thing happened the other night! While attending a meeting I mentioned that I would be participating in the 3 day . . . And a woman, whom I did not know, walked up to me after the meeting and handed me a donation! We talked about when she had participated in the walk a few years ago, how difficult yet rewarding it was and she truly inspired and motivated me even more!So here is why I choose to walk:I walk because...Too many of my family and friends have been affected by breast cancer.I will walk knowing the money I raise will be helping so many.I will walk praying for a cure so our daughters and sons will only know breast cancer as a thing of the past.I will walk because I can!Times are hard, we all know. But every dollar counts, and brings us closer to a cure. Please look in your hearts and consider a donation. If you would like to donate you can donate online at http://www.the3day.org/. Just click on Donate Now and search for my personal fundraising page. You can also call 800.996.3DAY to donate over the phone.

If you know or have someone who is diagnosed with Breast Cancer, (or any type of cancer) please give me their name so I can carry them with me through all 60 miles.

Thank you for taking the time to read this letter, and thank you for your support.

Colleen

If you are unable to donate online, please print out a donation form.
Click here to visit my personal page. If the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:http://www.the3day.org/site/TR/Walk/ChicagoEvent?px=3292672&pg=personal&fr_id=1293&et=Y268ckfK4AF9MTxODFrpVQ..&s_tafId=182530
Click here to view the team page for Mamas for Tatas If the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:http://www.the3day.org/site/TR/Walk/ChicagoEvent?team_id=85260&pg=team&fr_id=1293&et=OBi5R6M5rU79t-qbPyhWAA..&s_tafId=182530
For more information about the Breast Cancer 3-Day, Susan G. Komen for the Cure or the National Philanthropic Trust Breast Cancer Fund, visit http://www.the3day.org/ or call 800.996.3DAY.

© 2009 Breast Cancer 3-Day. 205 N. Michigan Avenue, Suite 2640, Chicago IL 60601

HANG ing Tough

To anyone fighting cancer or living with it...
I’d like to share with you, MY MANTRA.
These powerful words truly got me through chemotherapy as they ran through my head over and over and over again. Reminds me to keep fighting every day...
((Oh! And my Tumor Marker & CellSearch tests came back clean from last week! ... WOOOOOO HOOOOOO!! I remain on pills to inhibit cancer growth for 5 years... I’ll be retested every 3 months. Somewhere down the line more scans…. but so far... STILL KICKIN'!))

TESLA ~Hang Tough
(the ever so inspiring (partial) lyrics below for those that insist you can't understand a word he is singing)




"Took a shot to the chin
Looks like you just can't win
In this do or die situation.
And it's harder than it seems
To survive, keep alive and make your dreams,
Make your dreams all come true.

You gotta, you gotta give it your best shot.
Give it ev'rything you got.
Oh, you gotta hang tough.
Hang tough. Hang tough.
Sometimes love can make you blue.
A heartache made just for you.
But you can't let it bring ya down.

If you should stumble, if you should fall,
Pick yourself up off the floor.
Fight for what's right and stand your ground.
You gotta give it your best shot.
Give it ev'rything you got.
Oh, you gotta hang tough.
Hang tough. Hang tough.
When the goin' gets rough. Hang tough.
You got to give it all you've got. Hang tough.
Keep your head above the ground.
Don't you let it get you down.
Oh, you gotta hang tough.
Hey! Oh! Hey! Oh!....."

Emotions build and creep in silently like an approaching, possibly threatening, storm. They run rampant like a fox hunt and bounce back and forth like a tennis match living with cancer. One minute you are living normal. Doing dishes. Laundry. Fixing Dinner. Cleaning up dog yak. The next you realize, you are not doing the things you set out to do. Spend quality time with your spouse. Go to the park. Study your child’s expressions upon her face. Finish the book you wanted to write for her, in case your not around and don’t get to tell her all the things you wanted to. Then you remember your last test came back with excellent results. You think to yourself, you still have time. So you go on with day to day things, not carrying out the precious things that mean so much to you. Next thing you know, you find out an acquaintance had that same clean test you did three months ago, but now has metastasis in much of her bones. Did they miss it last time? Did it just grow that fast? Couple days go by and you go back to blogs of others with similar diagnosis and someone else logged on for them. For the final message. To inform everyone the bloggers lost the fight and have passed on. Fear, panic and realization set in once again. While you hope and pray you’ll have 10 or 20 years more, you feel time slipping away. You’re bordering phobic once again. The possibility of only 6 months more creeps back in... at the same time you feel guilty for worrying about your own mortality more then hers. You feel sad for the friend that is having a horrible recurrence, sorry for the families that just lost their wife, mother, sister, aunt…Guilt of wasting time with droll things and not giving more of yourself to others.

Wanting to be cured, knowing you won’t hear words like remission for many years, maybe 10, but hoping you will be here AT LEAST that long…. Deleting web links off your favorite places of other sufferers, because they passed on… Hearing your doctor, trying to be encouraging, say, ‘I have one patient as bad as your case and it’s been 7 years. She’s still here.’ That’s great. It truly is. Then again, what about the others? What happened to them? Was her case so highly unusual that he brought her up? What did she do? Can I do it? Was she the same one that had a bad test when mine came back good? You find yourself in a vicious circle of neurotic obsession.

These are emotions and questions of mortality that are completely normal. But there’s no way around them.

Eventually, you get past what every one says are “negative thoughts” and move on with normal life, as always.

On the other hand, perhaps negative thoughts are needed. Perhaps negative thoughts can lead into something positive. Lead you to becoming.
Perhaps the negative needs to creep in to remind you to get your ass moving, worry about the truly important things, enjoy what you can while you can.

This can be said for ANYONE that forgets there are blessings in your life in small packages every day. You don’t need to have a disease to set aside the pessimism so you can become more productive, more appreciative.

This past week, while I tried to function on a normal level, a feeling out of the blue, like a sharp knife in the pit of my stomach, came to me. I feel like I might be heading toward disease progression. My next appointment isn’t until July. And I’ll secretly worry until then. But I’ll also do what I can to calm myself.