Wednesday, April 23, 2008

For better or for worse

When you make the holy sacrament of marriage, the priest says “For better or for worse”, yet no one ever expects something life changing to happen to themselves or anyone in their household. I’d have expected it to be me taking care of Bobby with his back problems along all the abuse he puts his body through working so hard at work and at home…. But it isn’t working out that way right now. I’ve gotta say, he has really stepped up to the plate – accepted the figurative reigns & run with them – He is, without question, really shining. He has picked up slack at home, showered me when I couldn't do it myself, without making any sex jokes or "hey baby" moves! He hasn’t bitched once about stopping at store, or picking up medications, been incredibly supportive, positive and loving. He hasn’t faltered. Even though he had added stress of his father having a stroke (he found that out the same day I was having surgery for the medi-port installation), more car problems with both vehicles… I just can’t believe he hasn’t cracked yet.

I couldn’t be more pleased watching him become even more involved and growing closer to our daughter. Not that he didn’t do things with her before. He’s done many things with her. Boating, Jet skiing, snowmobiling, bicycle riding, roller-skating, playing polly-pockets (even though he made the boy rob the girl behind the cash register, he made it more interesting), planting gardens, playing video games, take her fishing, watching shows she wants to watch (Sarah & I both strongly agree his laugh is totally infectious), trying to help with homework (but could never do it quit the way mom could and he felt like a shut out minority living among 2 girls). He is putting forth more effort (and I’m stepping back to allow his efforts reach her, which was probably the biggest obstacle). I truly enjoy watching the interaction and am delighted their bond is getting stronger.
When we got married, I knew we would “share our lives”. But beyond living in the same house, sharing the bills, being friends (w/benefits), spending time together… On our wedding day, 15 years ago, it never crossed my mind something like this would happen and you would be there for me so much more then I could have ever thought. So often things we’ve been through, from our house fire, supporting all of us, to this, tear other families apart, but here you are, pulling us all closer together. You are struggling with this as much (or more) then I or Sarah. You have not once lost it, gotten upset or aggravated with me. You’ve kept your cool with our hormonal “t’ween” daughter. You are right there to say what I need to hear while trying to maintain some normalcy in our home for all of us.

They say a girl often marries someone like her father.
I would be proud if she finds someone, just like you.

I love you, “this much more then 10 minutes ago”.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Our Love and prayers are with you all - Bobby - words are not enough. Not for anything you all are going through.
All our love and prayers,
gayle and family